Friday, May 6, 2011

Logic Fail of the Day

is brought to you by the Main Street Christian Church in Russiaville, Indiana.

Pastor Stephen Bishop posted on his church's facebook (now either down or private):

“Well, yesterday's sermon was a big hit! We had a mass execution of feeder fish that I pulled out of a fish tank and then threw all over the floor. The kids were in shock and then started to pic[sic] them up and put them back into the fish tank. Obviously, most of them died in the effort...the point however was made that they cared more about .15 cent feeder fish then[sic] they do about their friends dying w/o Christ.”

This gets posted on Reddit, and sparks an interesting line of insane justifications from the holy man himself, including:

"The lesson was not in making things suffer or allowing things to suffer. The point of the lesson was that we shouldn't want individuals to suffer in hell for all of eternity. That we need to act quickly because none of us are promised tomorrow and that we only have this moment to make an eternal impact on the lives of those we love."

Yes, because killing things totally illustrates that.

"I got [these methods] from someone else and used them because it was a GREAT illustration that I believed would and infact[sic] did have a deep and powerfully positive impact for our youth and their relationship with Jesus. Again positive. Again, are you saying fish have souls, because that obviously is not what I believe."

Not having a soul = totally disposable and just fine to callously discard.

"First of all, I did not equate the spiritual value of the fish to their monetary value. Fish have no spiritual value, but they do have nutritional value in that fish are food. They were given to us to be eaten and to be eaten by other animals. We are to be concerned yes for all living things but more so for the souls of mankind. I read that Jesus taught this same lesson to the disciples when they just left their boats, nets, and FISH to go and follow him and become fishers of men. It was not a message of fear for Jesus nor was it a message of fear for me. It was a message of love...love for all of mankind and the desperate need to reach everyone with his love before it is too late."

Love!

"I removed the post and opened a thread of response here because there ARE CHILDREN who view our church's FB and they don't need to see all of the hate postings and cussing that is being sent to me. I[sic] not unsure of my methods and I am not the first individual to have used this illustration. I received it from Michael Rowan, who is a world renown[sic] sought after speaker and he received it from one of his personal friends. I am sure that there are other pastors out there who have also done very similar illustrations. If it makes everyone feel better, next time I'll go and buy a bunch of already processed fish (which were also raised to be killed and eaten) fry them up and throw them on the floor. Great impact there as well since it will also show the fact that we waited too long to save the fish and they got killed and fried. Same difference as far as I can tell. Of course there are those of you who don't eat anything that was living...right??? opps[sic]...wait, the carrots might still be thinking ,"please put me back in the ground, you're hurting me." Sorry for my satire but this is getting old. Fish do not have a soul and we are "worth more than many sparrows," for those of you who have decided to just rip scripture out of context go down just one more verse and finish the thought of Jesus in Luke 12. Of course in Genesis 1:28 God gives us "rule over the fish of the sea," but sadly nobody seems to want to recognize these facts. Again, sorry for my satire."

The point is fucking red-shifting as it goes over this dude's head.

RT the Pharyngula article on this, or use #mainstreetchristianchurch. I'd love to see this spread across the internet as a big old WTF moment.

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